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Which Jesus?

Re: Which Jesus?

Postby bigduke6 » 11 Jun 2012, 08:48

Which Jesus?

I choose Jesus Jones or the Jesus dude from the big lebowski.

More entertaining.

Jesus Quintana: Let me tell you something, pendejo. You pull any of your crazy shit with us, you flash a piece out on the lanes, I'll take it away from you, stick it up your ass and pull the fucking trigger 'til it goes "click."
The Dude: Jesus.
Jesus Quintana: You said it, man. Nobody
fucks with the Jesus.

Mr.Lahey: The shitabyss!
Randy: Mr. Lahey, not another night of the shitabyss, please?!
Mr.Lahey: Ah, fuck it.

If you talk to god, you're religious. If god talks to you, you're psychotic.
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby Fortigurn » 11 Jun 2012, 10:52

Vay wrote:Among the points of interest were the evolution of the identity of Jesus and the amount of verbatim copying in evidence between the allegedly independent gospels.


I'm not sure who told you that all the gospels were independent. The earliest Christian commentators identified the dependencies of the synoptic gospels (not including John), on each other, and started the investigation into what is known today as the 'Synoptic Problem'. The fact is that the issue is far more complex than mere interdependence. The synoptic gospels share a common body of material which most scholars believe was supplied by an earlier source, but Matthew and Luke also contain material which is unique to each gospel, and is understood to have been taken from other independent earlier sources.
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby Jack Burton » 11 Jun 2012, 11:32

I choose the Jesus who is in the parking lot of Home Depot. He and his friends are excellent carpenters, know decent English, and are quite dependable.
Jack Burton: I don't get this at all. I thought Lo Pan...
Lo Pan: Shut up, Mr. Burton! You are not brought upon this world to get it!
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby Dr. McCoy » 11 Jun 2012, 12:51

Supply Side Jesus is cool.
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby zender » 18 Sep 2012, 11:13

I've been watching a few documentaries lately, and I liked the two below.

The first is about an Aussie that claims to be Jesus Christ and seems to have convinced a lot of followers that they are others from the same time period. You may think he convinces girls that they're Mary Magdalene just to get into their pants... I wonder if this guy could be the next David Koresh.


Here's a good little documentary on Siberian Jesus. He wrote the Last Testament, which includes critical info on which brand of detergent you should use etc.

-----------------
And here's a short interview of Glenn Beck interviewing Puerto Rican Jesus Man. He's an ex heroin addict who's into the bling.


Any other clips of people who think they're Jesus? I'm not so much looking for Sun Myung Moon, David Koresh or Jim Jones documentaries. I'm wondering if there are others who are still alive out there that think they're Jesus.
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby Tempo Gain » 19 Sep 2012, 01:31

NYT: A Faded Piece of Papyrus Refers to Jesus’ Wife

Seems interesting, and timely for this thread?
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby zender » 19 Sep 2012, 07:47

Tempo Gain wrote:NYT: A Faded Piece of Papyrus Refers to Jesus’ Wife

Seems interesting, and timely for this thread?

From the article:

"The piece is torn into a rough rectangle, so that the document is missing its adjoining text on the left, right, top and bottom — most likely the work of a dealer who divided up a larger piece to maximize his profit, Dr. Bagnall said.

Much of the context, therefore, is missing."

What a shame that someone had to chop up a page of 1600-year-old writing, just to make it more valuable. :doh:
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby Dr. McCoy » 19 Sep 2012, 09:38

Don't tell me that da Vinci code was right.
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby elburro » 19 Sep 2012, 09:41

This fails to include the Republican Jesus.
http://www.addictinginfo.org/2012/09/02 ... can-jesus/
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High purity omega-3 imported directly from Norway to Taiwan.
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Re: Which Jesus?

Postby Zla'od » 19 Sep 2012, 11:02

Well this works out great, because now that Rev. Moon is dead, we're short one Jesus. I think any of the above would do nicely.
“What part of a woman is the yet, anyway? I heard there was a fight here in Tulsa, and a woman was shot in the fracas. The doc said the bullet is in her yet. And how did the bullet get in her yet, when she was shot in the fracas?"
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