It's a zero sum game mate, there is no win-win with your wife and that can really mess us up and lead to bad decisions being made.
My recent one is the first floor. My In-laws want it converted to a living room, my wife wants it converted to a play area/living room. I was an adamant no, till she ruined our date night about it. I decided to compromise, I'll clean it up and move everything, but I want curtains. Her response, "Why does it always have to be about what you want? Curtains are hard to clean." I was the one going to have to install them, move all my stuff from the 1st fl to the 4th, and then move all the 2nd flr stuff to the first. This has been going on for her for 3 years.
Sometimes it's just about power and who has it. Your kid steps foot in Taiwan before 18 with your wife and she'll have it all over you. Ask pgdaddy how well that worked out for him.
Professor Walter Williams has remarked that he’s glad he went to college “before it became fashionable for white people to like black people.”