Click here to go to our new forums at
If you are a Forumosan Regular, when you log in for the FIRST TIME, you must RESET your password by using the Password Recovery system.

Usernames on the new forums must not contain any SPACES and must end with LETTER or a NUMBER; if yours does, you will be prompted to change your Username
Contact us at admin(at)forumosa(dot)com or @forumosa on Twitter or on our Facebook Page if you have any questions or problems logging back in

All men will cheat, wife wants 100% control of money -- help

Procedures, processes, JFRV, potential documentation difficulties, whether to get married in Taiwan or overseas, as well as legal basis for divorce in Taiwan, including all related problems and pitfalls, child custody, alimony payments, abandonment, extra-marital affairs, and other complications...
Forum rules
While the moderators are happy to help point people in the right direction for legal assistance and to attempt to keep these forums civil and tidy, please bear in mind that an Internet forum is not the place for providing or receiving legal advice or for the creation of any attorney-client privileges or obligations. Also keep in mind that Forumosa and the moderators cannot conduct comprehensive reviews of all laws or legal concepts referenced or discussed within these forums – laws and regulations are updated and amended, interpretations do change, and sometimes the legal landscape can change very fast. Forumosa provides these legal forums for general informational purposes only. By using these legal forums, you agree that the information does not constitute legal or other professional advice and no attorney-client or other relationship is created between you and any other posters on these forums. DO NOT CONSIDER THE FORUMS TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR OBTAINING LEGAL ADVICE FROM A QUALIFIED LICENSED ATTORNEY.

Postby Indiana » 24 Dec 2007, 20:02

Separate accounts are the smart way to go, IMO. My husband and I put our money together soon after we started dating, and had continued to do so up until about two years ago (after 8 years of putting our cash together). The reason we decided to split it was because I had ended up doing all of the finances and my husband took a back seat to it and ended up not knowing what was going on unless I continually updated him. That was fine, but it got old after we started to bicker a little bit over money before we went to study for a year and weren't going to be working. For the first time, we started disagreeing about how much we needed to save and what was "ok" to spend. In the end, we split our savings and went independently from there to avoid future problems. It has worked a charm. We keep separate accounts but periodically put cash into a joint fund, which we use for bills and nights out and the like. It also takes the guilt away when you want to spend cash on something extra for yourself, for example.

I would also be wary of letting your TW spouse take complete control. I know of a certain mindset of the women in Taiwan to stash cash away in case something goes wrong in the marriage. I also personally know a woman who admitted to me one night after a few drinks that she had put a down payment on a house for her parents with her husband's money without his knowledge. She said she had been stashing it away for a few years and that he hadn't noticed. The amount was NT 300,000. In addition to that, she gives money to her family without his knowledge. Her husband trusted (and still does trust) her completely too, not to mention his trust in her whole family, who together seem to systematically pull the wool over his eyes when it comes to money matters (and other matters which his wife has admitted to me, but I won't get into those here, I will get too angry :fume: ). So, be careful, lads... :(
User avatar
Mandarin Marvel (Guóyǔ gāoshǒu)
Mandarin Marvel (Guóyǔ gāoshǒu)
Posts: 1882
Joined: 28 Sep 2005, 10:49
Location: UAE

Postby urodacus » 24 Dec 2007, 21:32

^ best answer. put half (or another agreed amount) into a joint account, use that for joint investment and purchases, and buy your joints from your own half.
The prizes are a bottle of f*!@#$% SCOTCH and a box of cheap f!@#$#$ CIGARS!

Too many people! Almost all of the world's problems are due to overpopulation. The rest are due to religion.

50% of the world's wild animals have disappeared in the last 50 years. Did you eat them, or eat their house?
User avatar
Maitreya Buddha (Mílèfó)
Posts: 12087
Joined: 04 Nov 2004, 23:20
Location: picking flowers

Money Money Money

Postby Craig » 19 Feb 2008, 16:59

Well this is not directly about mixed marriages and money, but I feel that what gets most couples into financial trouble is a lack of communication, and a lack of understanding of how their money is working or not working for them. The issues most individuals have is spending habits and a lack of doing a budget (most people have no idea where their money goes every month). I feel that both people in a couple need to understand their money and where it is going. Leaving all the responsibility to one person is dangerous and irresponsible. What happens if one person (the money controller) dies unexpectedly (yes it can happen) and then other has no idea what to do about finances or even where the money is, or even if they have control over it (here in Taiwan there is a risk of that).

As for giving money to family members, this is risky, especially to people who have demonstrated that they are poor with money, if I was married I would never just give money to my in-laws, giving money to people with money problems almost never solves their money problems. They need to change their habits first, if you just give them money they will waste it. I would want to know that they are going to handle the money "responsibly". After all as a few other posters have said, it is important that you take care of you and your spouse first, then when you are in a strong position to give that is when you give. I know people will say but what about traditions and obligations. Traditions are great if they are handled in a responsible manner, I am not Taiwanese so if I eventually marry my girlfriend we will not live our lives 100% Taiwanese, if she demands this well I will not get married as it is probably not going to work :lol:

A lot of what people have said in this thread I feel, could have been solved with better pre-marriage communication and post-marriage continuation of that communication :bravo: . Be married is not always easy but when you can't discuss money in reasonable ways well things will get tough. And financial trouble is the number 1 reason for divorce in N. America.

So in short everyone should understand their money and how it works (or doesn’t).
Memorized My Password (gāng jìhǎo zìjǐ de mìmǎ)
Posts: 50
Joined: 03 Jan 2005, 06:36

   Please remember that Forumosa is not responsible for the content that appears on the other side of links that Forumosans post on our forums. As a discussion website, we encourage open and frank debate. We have learned that the most effective way to address questionable claims or accusations on Forumosa is by engaging in a sincere and constructive conversation. To make this website work, we must all feel safe in expressing our opinions, this also means backing up any claims with hard facts, including links to other websites.
   Please also remember that one should not believe everything one reads on the Internet, particularly from websites whose content cannot be easily verified or substantiated. Use your common sense and do not hesitate to ask for proof.

Return to Marriage

Who is online

Forumosans browsing this forum: No Forumosans and 0 guests