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Getting Laid as Student

A non-threatening place for individuals and couples living in Taiwan to discuss dating and relationship issues

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The Dating and Relationship Forum is a non-threatening place for individuals and couples living in Taiwan to discuss dating and relationship issues, including: love, romance, sex, communications, familial relationships, cultural issues, activities for couples, psychology, marriage, dating (i.e. "how to meet")

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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby finley » 16 Jan 2015, 19:32

Casey ATX wrote:Honestly this thread sort of horrifies me. I'm so glad that when I was a teenager, I had the presence of mind to not be enslaved by this obsession with sex.


But then again, you only live once. What, I wonder, is the OP supposed to take home from Taiwan's world-class educational system? And I don't see why cultural exchange must of necessity exclude the exchange of bodily fluids. Is it somehow better to be enslaved by an obsession with exams and a lifetime of fluorescent-lit blue cubicles?

A little classic R.L.Stephenson to put things in perspective:

An Apology for Idlers

It is surely beyond a doubt that people should be a good deal idle in youth. For though here and there a Lord Macaulay may escape from school honours with all his wits about him, most boys pay so dear for their medals that they never afterwards have a shot in their locker, and begin the world bankrupt. And the same holds true during all the time a lad is educating himself, or suffering others to educate him. It must have been a very foolish old gentleman who addressed Johnson at Oxford in these words: "Young man, ply your book diligently now, and acquire a stock of knowledge; for when years come upon you, you will find that poring upon books will be but an irksome task."

The old gentleman seems to have been unaware that many other things besides reading grow irksome, and not a few become impossible, by the time a man has to use spectacles and cannot walk without a stick. Books are good enough in their own way, but they are a mighty bloodless substitute for life. It seems a pity to sit, like the Lady of Shalott, peering into a mirror, with your back turned on all the bustle and glamour of reality. And if a man reads very hard, as the old anecdote reminds us, he will have little time for thought.


The OP, assuming he is real, doesn't appear to be either an asshole or an idiot, so what difference does it make if he keeps in it his pants until he's 18, or 21, or 45, or whatever the US-government approved age is?
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby Dr. Milker » 17 Jan 2015, 00:54

Casey ATX wrote:Honestly this thread sort of horrifies me. I'm so glad that when I was a teenager, I had the presence of mind to not be enslaved by this obsession with sex. OP: you are in high school, and have miraculously been given the incredible opportunity to study abroad, in Taiwan of all countries, and your primary concern is getting laid? I don't think you realize what an opportunity you've been given as an exchange student. There'll be time for fooling around later; use your precious gift to appreciate this travel opportunity. God youth is wasted on the young. When you look back on this trip thirty years from now, do you want to remember all the amazing sights you saw and all the opportunity for cultural exchange and global awareness you gained, or do you want to remember how you spent your time on some message board trying to figure out how to get in some girl's pants? I don't know if you've heard the expression "casting pearls before swine", but, ugh. Look around you. Getting laid should be the least of your priorities.

It horrifies you? Seriously? Why not enjoy sex when those teenage hormones are raging? That's what memories are made of. That's the inspiration for art! Have you never listened to "Night Moves"? Are you the Church Lady? Have you never listened to rock 'n' roll? Why do cultural exchange and teenage sex have to be mutually exclusive? Yes, there will be time for fooling around later, but there's also time for fooling around now, and there's no time like the present! I'm sure glad that I wasn't taking advice from fuddy-duddies like you when I was a teenager....
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby Ermintrude » 17 Jan 2015, 08:27

And look where we are now.

I wish I'd been less of a dick when I was younger, prettier and smarter. I could have gone to a better uni, had a better career.

Rock n roll, for sure, but he ain't that either.

Focus is important.
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby finley » 17 Jan 2015, 12:43

Ermintrude wrote:I wish I'd been less of a dick when I was younger, prettier and smarter. I could have gone to a better uni, had a better career.

Everyone was a dick when they were younger. Part of being younger is learning how not to be such a dick. And none of us know what WOULD have happened if we'd made choices XYZ. You might indeed have gone to some fashionable university ... and then ended up spending your life in board meetings blithering earnestly about synergy and best practice.

I know plenty of parents who spent the last couple of decades working their asses off and talk wistfully about not spending more time with their kids while they were growing up, because "those years will never come again". Well, the same applies to the kids. I find it appalling that we make little kids - especially stupid kids - sit through badly-designed lessons about subjects they'll never use and can't comprehend, when they'd be much happier, and would probably learn just as much, by grubbing around in the dirt outside. There's a whole lot of talk these days about letting them enjoy the "innocence of childhood", but in reality adults are only prepared to let them enjoy it on their terms. And besides, I don't think childhood (or adolescence) is about "innocence" at all: children are little bastards, and I think the purpose of one's early years is to screw up as much as possible while the consequences remain fairly minor.

Sure, kids need to be educated. They need to learn how to get on well with all kinds of people, and how to get what they want without the use of a broken bottle. They need to learn how to feed and clothe and house themselves, and how to handle the money that provides those things. They need to learn what being a parent is going to mean. None of that is taught in school. You get it from your parents, or you learn it yourself (or not, in most cases). Once you've got those things sorted, you'll have the time and the wherewithal to keep your head in a book.

Anyway, WRT to the OPs situation, I think adolescence is the one time in your life when affairs of the ... heart can remain legitimately shallow. It's foolish to talk about teenagers being "emotionally incapable" of having "meaningful relationships". Of course they're emotionally incapable. That's the whole point. You can experiment and then write it down to experience. If you're hurt (or hurt someone else's feelings), well, you've learned something useful for the future. The idea that maturity simply arrives by magic on one's 18th birthday is wishful thinking by puritanical minds.
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby Ermintrude » 17 Jan 2015, 13:51

finley wrote: You might indeed have gone to some fashionable university ... and then ended up spending your life in board meetings blithering earnestly about synergy and best practice.


That's what did happen. If I'd been less of a lazy pointless cow, I might have gotten a good education.
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby finley » 17 Jan 2015, 14:43

maybe, maybe not. I was a lazy git when I was at uni (at school not so much). I hardly even turned up for entire modules, scraped through the exams, and came out with a 2.2. Still, I've got more-or-less everything I could possibly want from life - although I wouldn't exactly call my career a "career", it's more like a hobby that people pay me for. There is essentially no connection between what I do now and what I did at school or university.

I can think of several pearls of wisdom I might usefully have given my younger self, but "have less sex" is definitely not one of them.

We make our choices and we live with them; we can't go back and change stuff; the only thing that matters is what we do today. You occasionally see documentaries about the "dangers" of teenage sex and drugs where they'll wheel out some moon-faced 20-year-old twiddling her fingers and looking at the floor, expressing regret about (say) having sex "too early". Who put ideas like that into her head? How, exactly, is that likely to have irreparably damaged a girl's life (unless, obviously, she was raped or ended up pregnant)? How is it productive to teach young people to regret things that cannot be changed, and can just as easily be framed as something positive?
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby Ermintrude » 17 Jan 2015, 15:49

It's different for women.

I'm not saying you're wrong, just that it depends.
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby tommy525 » 17 Jan 2015, 23:32

I guess I was lucky I was chicken. When I was 16, my bud said there was this classmate who could do the both of us. I went along with him to her house. And I was so glad that it wasn't happening. LOL.

She would not have appealed to me anyway.

I lost my virginity at 19 to a 29 year old who seduced me. And that was a lot of fun :)

At 16 a lot of people are not quite ready to handle the "sword".
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby Cinematic » 18 Jan 2015, 04:21

You're overthinking this, as I did at your age. Just learn how to ask for what you want in a tactful way. Don't be afraid of showing that you're interested or looking like a fool. If it doesn't work out, you just move along and your life goes on. Best of luck.
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Re: Getting Laid as Student

Postby spaint » 19 Jan 2015, 14:28

Whatever the OP does, he needs to get some condoms. Every single 7-11 has them, so there's no excuse.
It's unbelievable how many young people in this country are fucking without any kind of protection whatsoever; it's like everyone's forgotten about AIDS, STDs and Babies.
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