dating advice for white girls?

A non-threatening place for individuals and couples living in Taiwan to discuss dating and relationship issues

Moderators: Tempo Gain, NonTocareLeTete

Forum rules
The Dating and Relationship Forum is a non-threatening place for individuals and couples living in Taiwan to discuss dating and relationship issues, including: love, romance, sex, communications, familial relationships, cultural issues, activities for couples, psychology, marriage, dating (i.e. "how to meet")

Please don't post personal ads here. They will be removed. Offensive posts will also be removed at the discretion of the moderators, including lewdness, excessive profanity, pornographic pictures, nasty and mean-spirited comments

If a post is moved to the Temporary Forum or edited, this is probably because the post is either off topic or violates one of the "general etiquette" rules. We'd like to keep this forum as open and friendly as possible - please keep these things in mind when posting. Thank you for your cooperation

Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby GuyInTaiwan » 18 May 2012, 10:10

Teddoman: It's always hard to sort out the truth in these matters, but I think my ex-colleague was doing okay for himself. I can't say for sure, but I think he always had several women on the go at once. He was definitely a "bad boy", but that was also part of his appeal. He was quite a macho guy (sometimes over the top actually), in great shape and very aware of it/loved to engage in displays of physical prowess, tattooed, etc. Everything about him screamed "handle with caution", yet I'm also sure that made him quite exciting. I had a female friend who met him at a party I had. I warned her about him, but she didn't listen. The whole situation ended extremely badly for her.

As for the guys trying to get upgraded, maybe sometimes it works, but I suspect they're what's known as intellectual whores. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=intellectual%20whore

HH2: One only need look at the proliferation of the so-called love motels in Taiwan. It's a hilarious topic to discuss with Taiwanese because they so frequently deny the existence of a lot of sleeping around, yet none ever really offers a plausible explanation for the sheer number of love motels in Taiwan. I used to live in Taoyuan, and that place literally has one on every corner. I don't know what it is about Taoyuan that makes it possibly the sly shag capital of Taiwan. Actually, yes I do. It's that it's so incredibly boring and there's nothing else to do there.
And you coming in to scold us all like some kind of sour-puss kindie assistant who favors olive cardigans and lemon drinks without sugar. -- Muzha Man

One sometimes gets the impression that the mere words "Socialism" and "Communism" draw towards them with magnetic force every fruit-juice drinker, nudist, sandal-wearer, sex-maniac, Quaker, "Nature Cure" quack, pacifist, and feminist in England. -- George Orwell
GuyInTaiwan
Entering Second Childhood (èrdù tóngnián qī)
Entering Second Childhood (èrdù tóngnián qī)
 
Posts: 7231
Joined: 10 Jun 2008, 23:01
341 Recommends(s)
273 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby steelersman » 18 May 2012, 20:20

As for the guys trying to get upgraded, maybe sometimes it works, but I suspect they're what's known as intellectual whores. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.p ... al%20whore


As I have always felt, if a girl is not into you the first time you meet, you are largely wasting your precious time.
steelersman
Wild Chicken Bus Driver (yě jī chē sī jī)
Wild Chicken Bus Driver (yě jī chē sī jī)
 
Posts: 1997
Joined: 30 Aug 2007, 03:58
10 Recommends(s)
24 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby Teddoman » 18 May 2012, 20:57

About Taoyuan, where in Taoyuan County? The city? I spent some time in Zhongli and never noticed anything unusual.

headhonchoII wrote:They are so conservative on the outside but the average Taiwanese have or had so many secret love affairs it's not funny!

Maybe it has something to do with the fast changes in dating sex and marriage practices on the island in just a couple of generations. I'm still amazed there are older Taiwanese alive today whose marriages were arranged and hadn't even met their spouses but a handful of times prior to the wedding day, much less any kissing or anything else. Huge difference with today.

steelersman wrote:As I have always felt, if a girl is not into you the first time you meet, you are largely wasting your precious time.

This is not how young Taiwanese people think, and that's probably not a good thing.

Having to work too hard to pursue a woman is also good evidence that she believes she's in a better league for whatever reason. Which leads to an unequal relationship and lack of respect for you. No woman is happy being in a relationship where she is "above" you somehow. She will extract her price on you in some other fashion by treating you like dirt or something else. Same is true in the reverse situation of a woman who likes a guy too much.

I think people are happiest in equal relationships. Relatively little pursuit required from either side during the dating phase is a decent proxy for measuring that equality.
Teddoman
Shoe-wielding Legislator (huīwǔ xiézi de lìfǎ wěiyuán)
Shoe-wielding Legislator (huīwǔ xiézi de lìfǎ wěiyuán)
 
Posts: 261
Joined: 03 Jan 2005, 00:31
12 Recommends(s)
10 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby mukashi » 06 Jun 2012, 11:39

I believe I did wrote something in this thread like a year ago.

As a white woman living in Taiwan for 5 years... I succeeded ;)
I was losing my hope, even adopted a cat, even though I was swearing I will wait with that to "30 and lonely", and I guess the cat worked as a charm :D

My bf is a Taiwanese, but he spent 2 years in US. And in a way I think this kind of "lived abroad" Taiwanese guys are still our hope here. I always was into Asian guys, I had few crushes on local guys, but they kind of always "friendzoned" me! (yeah it worked the other way around too!).

When a girl flirt, the guy just probably think it's the western people being "open", because after all in Europe we kiss and hug with friends to say "Hi". So it's not easy to flirt with them, seriously. But I made a pretty bitter post about the difficulties year ago, so now, how the success happened.

I met my bf online. There's a website I think connected to tealit somehow - http://www.heypersonals.com/welcome/
It is paid service, but I only use free option, and so did my bf. He was smart enough to look for my nickname in Facebook, though I put there a link to my other website where my e-mail could be found too. So there are ways around if you want them.
That websites is perfect in a way, and any dates I got in Taiwan, with Taiwanese or foreigners was through it. So I guess I can recommend it. People who are there, are looking for foreigners.

Well, surely we have some up and down with my bf, but I think they're more due to the male vs female differences, and generally after 9 months it's going well, and I am going to meet his family this weekend, which in Taiwan apparently is a big step, I was unpleasantly surprised how long it took my bf to do so... this might be a culture difference here.

wish me luck then, I love the guy a lot :) and he's all geeky, but that's what I like :lick:
Forumosan avatar
mukashi
Newspaper Copyeditor (bàoshè biānjí)
Newspaper Copyeditor (bàoshè biānjí)
 
Posts: 472
Joined: 21 May 2009, 21:38
Location: Taichung City,Taiwan
38 Recommends(s)
15 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby bismarck » 06 Jun 2012, 14:00

Great to hear your good news! Hope it keeps going well for you guys. :thumbsup:

mukashi wrote:Well, surely we have some up and down with my bf, but I think they're more due to the male vs female differences, and generally after 9 months it's going well, and I am going to meet his family this weekend, which in Taiwan apparently is a big step, I was unpleasantly surprised how long it took my bf to do so... this might be a culture difference here.

Pretty normal. I've been with my girl for 10 months now and she only showed her mum a picture of me and told her I am her boyfriend about 3 weeks ago. She says we should still wait awhile until we decide whether or not we want o get more serious or not before I actually meet them. Good luck with the meet and greet! :wink:
Image
World Champions 1995, 2007; Tri-Nations champions 1998, 2004, 2009; Grand Slam Champions 1912/13, 1931/32, 1951/52, 1960/61; Defeated British & Irish Lions 1903, 1924, 1938, 1962, 1968, 1980, 2009
Image
Super 14 Champions 2007, 2009, 2010
Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash.
Sir Winston Churchill

Second of all, as in all honeymoons, all is well until it is not. It is until the unexpected happens that you will see all grievances surface -ask anyone in any relationship. The girl can chew with her mouth open, that if you love her, you do not care. If you do not lover her, if her pinkie toe is half an inch deviant, the relationship is doomed. - Icon
Forumosan avatar
bismarck
Maitreya Buddha (Mílèfó)
 
Posts: 11605
Joined: 07 Jan 2005, 04:44
Location: Tainan City 台彎, 台南
150 Recommends(s)
143 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby mukashi » 06 Jun 2012, 14:41

bismarck wrote: Pretty normal. I've been with my girl for 10 months now and she only showed her mum a picture of me and told her I am her boyfriend about 3 weeks ago. She says we should still wait awhile until we decide whether or not we want o get more serious or not before I actually meet them. Good luck with the meet and greet! :wink:


Thanks :p According to my bf I should be fine. I am told by my Taiwanese friend how to address them and I plan to bake a cake to win them over :D Not many Taiwanese girls my age can do that :)

Agnes
Forumosan avatar
mukashi
Newspaper Copyeditor (bàoshè biānjí)
Newspaper Copyeditor (bàoshè biānjí)
 
Posts: 472
Joined: 21 May 2009, 21:38
Location: Taichung City,Taiwan
38 Recommends(s)
15 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby Teddoman » 06 Jun 2012, 23:27

mukashi wrote:wish me luck then, I love the guy a lot :) and he's all geeky, but that's what I like :lick:


Nice...for the geeks shall inherit the earth.

mukashi wrote:I plan to bake a cake to win them over :D Not many Taiwanese girls my age can do that :)


The best defense is a good offense! Plus, first impressions and all :thumbsup:
Teddoman
Shoe-wielding Legislator (huīwǔ xiézi de lìfǎ wěiyuán)
Shoe-wielding Legislator (huīwǔ xiézi de lìfǎ wěiyuán)
 
Posts: 261
Joined: 03 Jan 2005, 00:31
12 Recommends(s)
10 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby mukashi » 07 Jun 2012, 08:22

Thanks :)

Well, I am just worried because I heard so many stories of fully Taiwanese and mixed couples having troubles thanks to the parents who thinks one side is not good enough for their beloved sons/daughters that I am a little worried. But my bf seems like a perfectly normal person so I guess his parents can't be to crazy.

Any stories of your own about the "meet my parents" in Taiwan?
Forumosan avatar
mukashi
Newspaper Copyeditor (bàoshè biānjí)
Newspaper Copyeditor (bàoshè biānjí)
 
Posts: 472
Joined: 21 May 2009, 21:38
Location: Taichung City,Taiwan
38 Recommends(s)
15 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby tommy525 » 07 Jun 2012, 08:57

Every kettle has a lid. Goes to show theres hope for everyone :)
Forumosan avatar
tommy525
Guan Yin (Guānyīn)
 
Posts: 18203
Joined: 14 Sep 2006, 17:25
Location: calif baby !
608 Recommends(s)
379 Recognized(s)



Re: dating advice for white girls?

Postby bismarck » 07 Jun 2012, 13:46

mukashi wrote:Thanks :)

Well, I am just worried because I heard so many stories of fully Taiwanese and mixed couples having troubles thanks to the parents who thinks one side is not good enough for their beloved sons/daughters that I am a little worried. But my bf seems like a perfectly normal person so I guess his parents can't be to crazy.

Any stories of your own about the "meet my parents" in Taiwan?

It doesn't matter whether you're Taiwanese or a foreigner. Parents here have a very good idea of what kind of partner they want their kids to match up with, and even if someone is Taiwanese, they may still not fit the bill. That happens a lot here too, and percentage wise may be just as much or more than Foreigner+Taiwanese hook ups.
That's why most couples here wait so long before they introduce their partner to their parents.
Image
World Champions 1995, 2007; Tri-Nations champions 1998, 2004, 2009; Grand Slam Champions 1912/13, 1931/32, 1951/52, 1960/61; Defeated British & Irish Lions 1903, 1924, 1938, 1962, 1968, 1980, 2009
Image
Super 14 Champions 2007, 2009, 2010
Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash.
Sir Winston Churchill

Second of all, as in all honeymoons, all is well until it is not. It is until the unexpected happens that you will see all grievances surface -ask anyone in any relationship. The girl can chew with her mouth open, that if you love her, you do not care. If you do not lover her, if her pinkie toe is half an inch deviant, the relationship is doomed. - Icon
Forumosan avatar
bismarck
Maitreya Buddha (Mílèfó)
 
Posts: 11605
Joined: 07 Jan 2005, 04:44
Location: Tainan City 台彎, 台南
150 Recommends(s)
143 Recognized(s)



FRIENDLY REMINDER
   Please remember that Forumosa is not responsible for the content that appears on the other side of links that Forumosans post on our forums. As a discussion website, we encourage open and frank debate. We have learned that the most effective way to address questionable claims or accusations on Forumosa is by engaging in a sincere and constructive conversation. To make this website work, we must all feel safe in expressing our opinions, this also means backing up any claims with hard facts, including links to other websites.
   Please also remember that one should not believe everything one reads on the Internet, particularly from websites whose content cannot be easily verified or substantiated. Use your common sense and do not hesitate to ask for proof.
PreviousNext




Proceed to Dating & Relationships



Who is online

Forumosans browsing this forum: No Forumosans and 3 visitors

Many people take no care of their money till they come nearly to the end of it, and others do just the same with their time -- JOHANN VON GOETHE